Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
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