I bet he comes in French.
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
