Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
