Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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