dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
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