chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Randomize
