Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
She announced her abortion via fbk
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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