have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize
