Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
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