still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
