And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
My cat gives me a boner
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
