I'm really into asian looking animals
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
