erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
