I think i peed on brittanys purse
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
All I want is dick and wine.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
So here I am, sexting at work.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
