I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
Randomize