I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Drunk is not a location!
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
Randomize
