question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
