D3 body, D1 cock
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
Randomize
