We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
