Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
