Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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