reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
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