Already got asked if we're dating
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Also, beer. Big fan.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
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