Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
