So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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