are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
Randomize
