Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
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