She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Randomize
