my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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