Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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