Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
Randomize
