she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Randomize
