stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
