plz talk dirty to me
You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
