i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize
