so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
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