Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Randomize
