Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
high people should be assigned attendants
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize
