Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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