sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize
