grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
Randomize
