Whod you bang
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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