Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize
