69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
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