Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Randomize
