Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
