i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
So much Jack, so little girl.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Randomize
