I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Randomize
