The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
