no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
