But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
