How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
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