He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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